Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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