My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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