it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
