Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Someone signed my nipple.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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