I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
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