id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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