She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
