I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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