More tranny stories later!
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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