There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
What drink are we having for lunch?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Randomize
