There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
