Who wears a wallet chain?!
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
that is very illegal...i love you.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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