Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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