I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
