Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
