I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
We left the knife in your bed.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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