I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
