Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
