she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
