Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
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