if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Randomize
