i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
