Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize
