how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I need to calm my uterus...
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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