i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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