I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize