It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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