And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
