no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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