real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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