then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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