too bad you live with your parents still
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
