if you like me you must not know who I am
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
