Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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