i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
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