Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
