Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize