I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
