So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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