Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
