how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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