Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
