We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
