Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Randomize
