I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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