I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
