So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Randomize
