I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
