her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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