I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
