No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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