y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
