it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize